My job in a nutshell

I found this poem a while ago and it cracked me up. Anyone who has worked any kind of customer service knows exactly what I'm talking about here. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my job, I really do. But like eveythin in life, every once in a while it feels like you catch all the crap.

MY JOB: It's not my place to run the train,the whistle I can't blow.
It's not my place to say how far the train's allowed to go.
It's not my place to shoot off steam, nor even clang the bell.
But let the damn thing jump the track...and see who catches hell.

Am I right, or am I right? :)

Dentists

Like probably about eighty percent of the country (if not the world) I hate going to the dentist.  I can say this because I will fully admit that the things that I hate them doing to me and my mouth are usually the direct result of things that I have done or neglected to do to my mouth (although you have to admit that me having five wisdom teeth is clearly not my fault...I think God just thought he was being funny when he did that to me and my sister).  But something like not flossing until I have some painful remnant of food taking up residence between two of my teeth is obviously no fault of the dentist.

Speaking of the dentist himself, who on earth chooses that as a career? Who chooses to spend their lives sticking their fingers in other people's mouths? There are few things grosser that I can think of doing everyday of forever. Yuck. It must be the money. Dentistry is a $50 billion dollars a year industry. (By the way, Hair Care is a $100 billion dollars a year industry...boy did I choose the right profession!)

So anyways, do you know what part of goig to the dentist I hate the most?  It's sitting in that chair for heaven knows how long with my mouth open so long that my jaw muscles seize up and lactic acid builds up and makes my face start to twitch uncontrollably. Closely followed by the way your mouth feels like it's filled with sand after they finish polishing your teeth no matter how well they rinse. Next would be the way they try to flavor the polishing stuff or the flouride but it still tastes like crap. Yeah...

The reason why all of this is coming up now is that I went to the dentist this week and boy was it fun (please note sarcastic tone).  Again, not the dentist's fault - it was all stuff that needed to be done. Still, I think the reason why people hate the dentist so much is because there's no instant gratification. The hair care industry does so well because you sit in your stylist's chair for an hour and BOOM! You're a whole new person! Sit in your dentist's chair for an hour and you leave with a mouth full of sand and an aching jaw. Just sayin. That's my philosophy for the day.

Grateful for...

(In no particular order)

1. Life: I am so thankful for the chance to be alive and to learn from my mistakes, to take chances, to love, laugh, cry, sing, skip, and any other verbs you can think of.

2. School: As much as everyone and even myself questioned my decision to forgo graduate school and pursue a career in cosmetology, I truly love it and am so happy with the direction my life is taking. 

3. Work:Although my job can be stressful, I am so grateful to have a good job where I can earn enough money to pay my bills, debts, and occassionally go on a retail therapy shopping spree. 

4. Church: I love my church, I love my ward, and I love my Heavenly Father and my brother and Savior Jesus Christ.

5. Books: Reading is one of my escapes. I am thankful for the Lord giving the gift of writing and literature to so many people so that I can appreciate their creativity.

6. Family: I have the best family anyone could ask for. Are we dysfunctional? Yes. Do we love each other anyways? Yes.

7. Music: I miss being in a choir but I am so happy for the ability to express myself in song.

8. Roommates: Ya'll are just awesome. :)

9. Friends: Kindergarten to college and everywhere inbetween, I have learned and grown from everyone I've met. My friends are what keep me sane and strengthen me every step of the way.

10. My body: What an extraordinary creation the human body is!

I want so badly to be able to do this kind of makeup on myself and others but every time I try it just doesn't come out right. However,  have not yet begun to fight! Victory will be mine! You will never take my freedom!!

Okay, so anyways,  I really want to be able to do this...I'll figure it out eventually. :)

By the way, this movie (Burlesque) is the COOLEST movie ever!!!

Validated as a true cosmotologist (sort of)

I had a five-top table come in to work today. They were all pretty stylish looking with great hair and make up and clothes. I figured they must work in the fashion industry in some way or another. When I walked up to the table to take their order one of them said, "You have beautiful hair; Are you a cosmetology student or a hair stylist?" Oh my gosh, talk about warm fuzzies!!! It was so nice to hear that after six months of school I finally resemble something close to the industry that I've decided to dive into. So here's to all of you out there: compliment people!!!! It could be exactly what they need to turn a crummy day into a good one.

Holding On

I've been feeling really down lately.  I work fulltime and go to school part time and consequently I don't have a lot of time for a social life.  I'm one of those people who needs social interaction and constant validation.  I need to have friends who I can talk to about anything. I need to feel like I have someone to lean on because alone I'm just not strong enough. I left school early yesterday because I felt so alone. I love living on my own, but I miss having my family close by.  I was dreading going to school today when this song popped into my head. It's from the musical The Ark by Michael McLean:

The message of this moment is so clear
And as certain as the rising of the sun
If your world is filled with darkness, doubt and fear
Just hold on, hold on, the light will come

Everyone who's ever tried and failed
Stands much taller when the victory's won
And those who've been in darkness for a while
Kneel much longer when the light has come.

It's a message every one of us must learn
That the answers never come without a fight
And when it seems you've struggled far too long
Just hold on, hold on, there will be light

Hold on. Hold on. the light will come.
If you feel trapped inside a never-ending night
If you've forgotten how it feels to feel the light
If you're half-crazy thinking you're the only one
who's afraid the light will never reall come -
Just hold on. Hold on. The light will come!

The message of this moment is so clear
And as certain as the rising of the sun
If your world is filled with darkness, doubt and fear
Just hold on, hold on, the light will come.

 It was so nice to feel the comfort that it brought.  I know things aren't going to be perfect right away, but I can hang in there and I know that eventually, everything will be alright.  Off to school now. :)

I had one of those slap-in-the-face, humbling realizations today that reminded me that I'm not nearly as perfect as I seem to think I am. I am far too judgemental of others. Despite the fact that I go around saying that you should live your life the way you want to, I judge others if they don't live the way I expect them to...I'm such a hypocrite. If I've ever done anything or said anything that made you feel inferior because I didn't approve, please disregard it and accept my sincere apology. I know for a fact that I've done this to more than one person. What is it that makes people think that they are so much better than others? Maybe it's the fact that I'm really a very insecure person so any personal triumph I manage to obtain I cling onto and refuse to let go. You know the phrase "blinded by your own ambition?" (at least I think that's a phrase...could be wrong).

I guess the only thing I can do now is to just learn from the experience and move on. But I can't pretend like it's not going to affect my life and relationships permanently.  Lol, this reminds me of a quote from one of my favorite books Anne of Green Gables: "Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it." This will be my mantra.  I hope Karma wasn't paying too much attention to the last couple of weeks...

The no caffeine thing

So I don't have a problem with drinking caffeine the way some Mormons do.  To me caffeine is just like video games or any other thing that can be harmless but in excessive amounts becomes addicting and can control certain aspects of your life. All things in moderation.

I honestly can't remember the last time I made a resolution, much less kept one, so i'm really stubborn on this one and I'm going to make it count.  I started on January 4th and have not had a drop of caffeine since no matter how much I have craved diet dr. pepper or how tempting all the free diet coke and work can be.  I'll let you know how it's going. Right now the goal is a month but I'll probably expand it from there to two months and so on and so forth. Wish me luck!

My opinion on blogs

So it took me a really long time to actually start a blog because to me they always seemed so pretentious to me.  Why is it so many people in the world think that everyone is interested in their every thought? I mean, I'm not exactly the authority on what should interest people, but to to me, to assume that your every thought is a gem worthy of posting and having friends, strangers, and your neighbor's beautician's dog read seems to be just a little bit narcissistic. I mean, I certainly wouldn't want my personal journal published for the whole world to read at leisure (by the way, I think Anne Frank is on the other side yelling at her father for publishing her private thoughts and feelings).  Maybe that's why people write blogs...it lets them announce their thoughts and feelings under their own jurisdiction.  And there's the case in point: people don't write blogs because thei expecting their thoughts to become the next great American novel; they're writing them because they need to be said.  The End.

No Net Ensnares Me

So this is my very first blog post...which by the way, this will be the second time I write it because I'm pretty sure my computer made a deal with the devil and hates me because the internet crashed right as I was finished writing it the first time. Gah!! Just sayin...

So anyways, I thought I would give a little explanation to my blog's title.  "No Net Ensnares Me" is a quote from my all-time favorite book, Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte.  The full quote says, "I am no bird and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being with an independent will." SO COOL, right?  To me what this means is that nobody should ever let anybody dictate their life for them.  We were all born with the ability to choose and think and feel and act freely for ourselves; what use is an incredible gift like that if we don't use it?  I know that I for one have spent far too much of my life doing what I thought others expected of me and not living for myself.  I'm not saying that it's okay to live selfishly, rather that to let your life be controlled by what you think others expect of you is not the way to live a happy life.